Comic Relief Staff v Students Charity Football Match!
Staff Line Up
Richard ‘Rampage’ Johnston
Steve ‘Stone Head’ Mitchell
Ben ‘Ball Greedy’ Shaw
Martin ‘Old Man’ Taylor
George ‘The Trickster’ Mole
Wayne ‘Maradonna’ Martini
Helena ‘High Kick’ Brothwell
Tracey ‘The Trickster’ Hobson
Liz ‘The Biz’ Abba
Ian ‘The Wolverine’ Woolerton
Oliver ‘The Accelerator’ Saunders
Mark ‘The Mean Machine’ Robinson
Dominic ‘The Daredevil’ Reed
Alastair “Sparrow Legs’ Weir
To raise money for Comic Relief the students came out in force to try and put one over on this formidable combined West Grantham Federation staff dream team.
The first match against the year 7’s was hard fought in the first 10 minutes with special skills being shown by Arthur DeSilva, who is clearly a future talent for the school. However with a combined age advantage of at least 1000 years and a weight advantage of on average at least 15 stone per player the staff gradually got into their stride to win the match with Mr Shaw scoring 3 goals.
The year 8’s presented a different challenge and again displayed fantastic skills and teamwork. By this point though, Wayne ‘Maradonna’ Martini was in full flow and Oliver ‘The Accelerator’ Saunders was showing his pace in midfield and clearly finding strong past form.
The year 9’s, arguably the schools strongest team, were shocked and rattled by an early staff goal created by a collective staff team effort that left at least half of the staff team laid up with aches and pains for a week. Ben ‘Ball Greedy’ Shaw found the back of the net after missing at least 60 times and nailed a nice header. One spectator was quoted as saying, ‘That’s why Mr Shaw should play in goal’. The effort was still going strong when in the dying seconds of the match the year 9’s struck back with a great equalizer to tie the match. Liz ‘The Biz’ Abba displayed dazzling skills as she left the likes of Scott Wood dazed and confused as to how she had skilled him so many times!
With arthritic joints fully warmed up and adrenalin levels so high that no injury could be felt until the following morning the staff team, buoyed up, by the arrival of Dominic ‘The Daredevil’ Reed went on a roll beating the year 10’s to reveres the previous staff football losses of years past.
Several students were quoted as saying, as they made their way in to the changing rooms that they were scared to play the staff team next year as they were getting so good. They also begged to stay and take down the goal nets and help tidy the changing rooms and wash the water bottles out, but after some serious persuasion they finally agreed to let us do it and made their way home.
I would like to thank all staff, students and spectators that made this fantastic event possible, and the former students Dion Desmond and Troy Eldred that came in and referred for the event. I would also like to thank Mr Shaw for borrowing his football team’s kit for the staff and the PE reporters and spectators who braved the rain to support and film the event.
